Hello! I’m Alessandra, a Life and Career Coach certified by the International Coaching Federation. Prior to transitioning into the world of coaching and freelancing in 2021, I accumulated over 20 years of experience across various industries. I spent the first half of my career working in European SMEs, and then over 10 years at Facebook – now Meta. At Meta, my main focus was on strategic operations, sales & marketing solutions and strategic account management. I worked both as an individual contributor and a people manager. I navigated corporate dynamics, managed change through multiple reorgs, and became comfortable with ambiguity. Senior stakeholder management, conflict resolution, project management and management of strategic accounts are all part of my experience at Meta. Over the past 4 years as a freelance Coach, I've had the chance to explore new ways of channelling leadership with the ultimate aim of delivering value to my clients. It’s been a truly enriching learning journey. Throughout my career, I’ve been an advocate for harnessing one's strength and I'm always happy to help people identify theirs. On a more personal note, a few years ago I visited Japan for the first time and fell in love with the country. Ever since, I've been on a slow but steady journey of learning its fascinating language. I appreciate your time in reading this. If you think that I could be of assistance in any way, do not hesitate to get in touch. I’d be delighted to support you on your journey. That is why I decided to put my expertise in service of the people on this platform.
My Mentoring Topics
- Management of strategic accounts
- Project management
- Stakeholder management
- Sales enablement
- People management
- Leading with emotional intelligence
- Personal Development Plan
- Career advice
- Change management
- Finding your and/or your team's strengths
- Conflict resolution
- Team structure
The Power of Habit - Why We Do What We Do, and How to Change
Charles Duhigg
Key Facts from "The Power of Habit" Habits are ingrained behaviours that occur almost automatically and they significantly influence our lives. Every habit consists of three elements: a cue, a routine, and a reward. The brain, in an effort to save effort, will try to turn any routine into a habit because habits allow our minds to ramp down more often. Identifying and understanding the cue and reward of a habit is the key to changing it. Changing one 'keystone habit' can cause a chain reaction effect, changing other habits as well. Willpower is a crucial element in habit formation and it can be strengthened over time. Organizations and societies also have habits, which can be identified and changed. Crises can provide opportunities to change organizational habits. The habit loop is a powerful framework for understanding how habits work and how to change them. The Golden Rule of Habit Change: You can't extinguish a bad habit, you can only change it. In-depth Analysis and Summary "The Power of Habit" by Charles Duhigg is a compelling exploration into the science of habit and how our habits shape our personal and professional lives. The book is divided into three parts: The Habits of Individuals, The Habits of Successful Organizations, and The Habits of Societies. In the first part, Duhigg introduces the concept of the habit loop, which consists of three elements: a cue, a routine, and a reward. This loop is a pattern that our brains latch onto and repeat whenever possible. For instance, if a person feels stressed (cue), they might go for a run (routine), resulting in the feeling of relaxation (reward). This loop becomes automatic over time, making the habit difficult to break. Duhigg emphasizes that the key to changing a habit is understanding its cues and rewards. This aligns with the concept of cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT), a well-established psychological treatment that helps people understand and change their behaviour by identifying the thoughts and emotions that trigger it. In the second part, Duhigg discusses organizational habits. He argues that corporations and other organizations have habits that dictate their functioning and success. By identifying and changing these habits, organizations can dramatically improve their effectiveness. This concept is reminiscent of organizational behaviour studies, which examine how individuals and groups behave within organizations and how these behaviours affect the organization's performance. The third part of the book extends the discussion to the habits of societies. Duhigg suggests that societal habits can be changed during times of crisis, providing an opportunity for societal reform. This concept echoes the theory of 'critical junctures' in political science, which suggests that major crises can lead to a long-term redirection of societal norms and behaviours. Duhigg's Golden Rule of Habit Change, states that you can't extinguish a bad habit, you can only change it. This principle is supported by behavioural psychology, which suggests that it's easier to replace a bad habit with a new one than to simply stop the bad habit. One of the key insights from the book is the concept of 'keystone habits'. Duhigg argues that some habits are more important than others because they can trigger a chain reaction of other habit changes. An example of a keystone habit might be regular exercise, which can lead to healthier eating and better sleep. Willpower, according to Duhigg, is like a muscle that can be strengthened over time. This idea is supported by research in psychology, which suggests that regular practice of self-control can improve our overall willpower. In conclusion, "The Power of Habit" provides a fascinating and scientifically-grounded exploration into the nature of habits. By understanding the habit loop and the key principles of habit change, we can gain control over our personal habits, influence the habits of organizations, and even enact societal change.
ViewThinking, Fast and Slow
Daniel Kahneman
Key Insights from 'Thinking, Fast and Slow' Cognitive Ease: The human brain tends to choose the path of least resistance when processing information. System 1 and System 2: Two distinct systems govern our thought processes. System 1 is fast, intuitive, and emotional, while System 2 is slow, deliberate, and logical. Heuristics and Biases: Our brains use mental shortcuts or 'heuristics' to make quick decisions, which can often lead to biases in our thinking. Prospect Theory: People tend to make decisions based on potential losses and gains, not final outcomes. Anchoring Effect: The first piece of information we receive about a subject heavily influences our perception of subsequent information. Availability Heuristic: We tend to judge the probability of events by how easily examples come to mind. Endowment Effect: We value things more when we own them. Hindsight Bias: Our tendency to see events as more predictable than they really are after they have happened. Framing Effect: The way information is presented can drastically affect how we perceive it and make decisions. The Halo Effect: Our overall impression of a person influences how we feel and think about their character. Deeper Analysis of the Book's Concepts 'Thinking, Fast and Slow', a seminal work by Daniel Kahneman, delves into the two systems that drive the way we think—System 1, which is fast and intuitive, and System 2, slow and deliberate. This dual-process theory of cognition is not new, but Kahneman's exploration of how these systems interact, often leading to cognitive biases, is groundbreaking. System 1 operates automatically and quickly, with little or no effort and no sense of voluntary control. It's the part of our brain that responds to a surprising sound in the darkness or decides to swerve to avoid an accident. This system is heavily influenced by our past experiences and emotions, making its responses feel intuitive and automatic. In contrast, System 2 allocates attention to the effortful mental activities that demand it, including complex computations and conscious decision-making. This system is slower and more deliberate, often stepping in to verify and modify the impressions and intuitions from System 1. However, System 2 is lazy and often defaults to the easier, automatic responses of System 1. This is where cognitive biases come in. Heuristics and biases are mental shortcuts that System 1 uses to make quick decisions. While these shortcuts can often be useful, they can also lead to systematic errors in our thinking. For example, the availability heuristic might lead us to overestimate the likelihood of dramatic events (like plane crashes) because they are more memorable and thus more easily available to our minds. Prospect theory, introduced by Kahneman and his colleague Amos Tversky, challenges traditional economic theory, which assumes that humans are rational actors. Instead, prospect theory suggests that people make decisions based on potential gains and losses, not the final outcome. This can lead to seemingly irrational decisions, such as refusing to take a small loss to potentially gain more in the long run. The anchoring effect describes our tendency to rely heavily on the first piece of information we receive (the "anchor") when making decisions. Even when the anchor is arbitrary or irrelevant, it can dramatically influence our judgments and estimates. Similarly, the framing effect reveals that the way information is presented can drastically affect our decisions. For example, people are more likely to opt for a surgical procedure if it’s presented with a 90% survival rate than a 10% mortality rate, even though both statistics convey the same information. In conclusion, 'Thinking, Fast and Slow' highlights how our thought processes—though powerful—are not always as rational, objective, or logical as we might believe. By understanding these biases, we can take steps to mitigate them and make better, more informed decisions.
ViewEmotional Agility - Get Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life
Susan David
Key insights from "Emotional Agility - Get Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life": - Emotional agility is about being aware and accepting of all your emotions, not just the ‘good’ ones. - Emotions are data, not directives. They provide us with information about our internal and external environment. - Getting hooked on certain emotions can lead us to react impulsively, instead of responding thoughtfully. - Showing up to our emotions means facing them directly, without judgment or attempts to suppress them. - Stepping out involves creating a space between stimulus and response, to allow for more mindful decision-making. - Walking your why means aligning your actions with your values and purpose. - Moving on includes developing the ability to make small, deliberate tweaks in your mindset, motivation, and habits. - Emotional agility is a skill that can be developed over time, and it's essential for personal and professional growth. - Emotional agility is not about ignoring negative emotions, but about holding them lightly. - Facing discomfort is a crucial part of emotional agility. - Emotional agility promotes resilience, productivity, health, and happiness. Analysis of the Content "Emotional Agility - Get Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life" by Susan David presents a comprehensive approach to recognizing, understanding, and managing our emotions. The book is premised on the idea that emotions are neither 'good' nor 'bad'. Instead, they are crucial data points that provide insights into our inner selves and the world around us. One of the crucial points in the book is the concept of 'getting hooked'. This refers to the automatic and often unconscious reactions we have to situations, triggered by our emotions. David argues that when we get hooked, we act impulsively, driven by our emotions, rather than thoughtfully responding to the situation. This can lead to unhelpful patterns of behavior that don’t serve us well. The author's proposed solution to 'getting hooked' involves four key steps: showing up, stepping out, walking your why, and moving on. 'Showing up' to our emotions involves confronting them directly, without judgment or an effort to suppress them. This is similar to mindfulness – a concept widely discussed in the field of psychology. It is the act of being fully present and engaged in the current moment, without distraction or judgment. 'Stepping out', the second step, is about creating a space between the stimulus and our response. This mindful distance allows us to choose how we respond to our emotions, rather than reacting impulsively. 'Walking your why' is the third step and it involves identifying and aligning our actions with our core values. This is a significant concept in positive psychology and is seen as a crucial factor in enhancing personal well-being and satisfaction. The final step, 'moving on', focuses on making small and deliberate changes in our mindset, motivation, and habits to align more closely with our values and goals. The book emphasizes that emotional agility is a skill that can be developed over time. It is not about ignoring or suppressing negative emotions, but rather, about holding them lightly and not allowing them to control our actions. Conclusion "Emotional Agility - Get Unstuck, Embrace Change and Thrive in Work and Life" is a significant contribution to the field of emotional intelligence and personal development. It provides a clear and practical framework for understanding and managing our emotions, promoting resilience, productivity, health, and happiness. It aligns well with existing concepts in psychology, such as mindfulness and values-based action, and provides a fresh perspective on how to navigate the complexities of our emotional landscape. This book is a must-read for anyone seeking to improve their emotional agility and thrive in both their personal and professional life.
ViewQuiet - The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking
Susan Cain
Key Insights from "Quiet - The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking" The Extrovert Ideal: Society has a bias towards extroversion, often associating extroverted traits such as being outgoing, assertive, and socially dominant with success. Introversion is Undervalued: Introverts, who are often quiet, reflective, and prefer solitude, are often misunderstood and undervalued in our society. Introverts and Extroverts Think Differently: The minds of introverts and extroverts function differently, affecting their energy, concentration, and reactions to stimulation. The Power of Introverts: Introverts have unique strengths and abilities that are often overlooked, like deep thinking, creativity, and the ability to concentrate for long periods. Introversion and Leadership: Introverts can be just as effective leaders as extroverts, often because they listen more and talk less. Introverts in the Classroom: Traditional educational environments may not be conducive to introverted students, promoting group work and constant interaction over quiet study and reflection. Introverts and Relationships: Introverts approach relationships differently than extroverts, often preferring a few close relationships over a large network of acquaintances. The Power of Solitude: Time alone can be beneficial for creativity and productivity, contrary to the common belief that collaboration always leads to better results. Nurturing Introverted Children: Introverted children need understanding and support to thrive in a world that often pushes them to be more outgoing. Introverts in the Workplace: The business world often rewards extroversion, but companies can benefit greatly from the unique skills and perspectives of introverts. Deep Dive into the Book's Content "Quiet" by Susan Cain is a groundbreaking book that challenges the societal bias towards extroversion and illuminates the often overlooked strengths and contributions of introverts. It begins by discussing the Extrovert Ideal, a cultural bias that favors outgoing, assertive, and socially dominant individuals. This bias permeates our education, workplace, and social environments, often leaving introverts feeling undervalued and misunderstood. Cain argues that this bias is misguided. Introverts, who are often quiet, reflective, and prefer solitude, have a different way of processing information and interacting with the world. They have unique strengths like deep thinking, creativity, and the ability to concentrate for long periods. These strengths can make them highly effective in roles and situations that require careful thought and attention to detail. The book also explores the neurobiological differences between introverts and extroverts. Introverts are more sensitive to dopamine, a neurotransmitter associated with reward-seeking behavior, while extroverts are more responsive to acetylcholine, a neurotransmitter linked to feelings of contentment and focus. This difference in brain chemistry explains why introverts tend to enjoy calm, low-stimulation environments, while extroverts crave high-stimulation activities. Despite the societal bias towards extroversion, Cain makes a compelling case for the power of introverts in leadership. She argues that introverted leaders often listen more and talk less, allowing them to understand their team's needs and ideas better. They are also less likely to take unnecessary risks, leading to more stable and successful organizations. The book also discusses the challenges introverts face in traditional educational and workplace environments. Schools often favor extroverted behaviors, promoting group work and constant interaction over quiet study and reflection. Similarly, the business world often rewards those who speak up and take charge, overlooking the unique skills and perspectives of introverts. Cain suggests that these environments could benefit from more balance, valuing both extroverted and introverted traits. In relationships, introverts often prefer a few close relationships over a large network of acquaintances. This can lead to deeper, more meaningful connections. However, it can also lead to challenges in a society that values networking and socializing. Cain highlights the power of solitude, arguing that time alone can be beneficial for creativity and productivity. This contradicts the common belief that collaboration always leads to better results. She also emphasizes the importance of understanding and supporting introverted children, who need to be nurtured in a way that respects their temperament. In conclusion, "Quiet" is a powerful examination of the undervalued power of introverts. It challenges societal biases, provides insights into the introverted mind, and offers practical advice for introverts navigating a world that can't stop talking. Cain's book is an essential read for introverts and extroverts alike, illuminating the value of different personalities and the importance of embracing diversity in our society.
ViewUnlocking Leadership Mindtraps - How to Thrive in Complexity
Jennifer Garvey Berger
Key Facts Author Jennifer Garvey Berger identifies five mind traps that leaders often fall into: the trap of simple stories, the trap of rightness, the trap of agreement, the trap of control, and the trap of ego. The book provides practical ways to escape these traps, focusing on embracing complexity rather than trying to oversimplify it. Leadership is not about having all the answers, but about asking the right questions and fostering a culture of curiosity and continuous learning. It emphasizes the importance of cognitive flexibility and agility in leadership roles. The book introduces the concept of 'complexity of mind' - the ability to hold multiple perspectives and to navigate ambiguity and uncertainty. It advocates for a more compassionate and empathetic leadership style, moving away from ego and control. Garvey Berger encourages leaders to embrace disagreements and conflicts as opportunities for growth and learning. Leadership is seen as a continual process of learning, unlearning, and relearning. The book provides practical exercises and thought experiments to help leaders identify their own mind traps. She emphasizes that the goal of leadership is not to eliminate complexity, but to thrive within it. The book is deeply rooted in adult development theory, particularly Robert Kegan's 'orders of consciousness' theory. In-depth Summary and Analysis "Unlocking Leadership Mindtraps - How to Thrive in Complexity" by Jennifer Garvey Berger is a ground-breaking book that challenges conventional wisdom about leadership and invites leaders to embrace complexity rather than trying to oversimplify it. The book begins by identifying five common mindtraps that leaders often fall into: the trap of simple stories, the trap of rightness, the trap of agreement, the trap of control, and the trap of ego. It's easy to fall into these traps because they are often reinforced by our culture and our own cognitive biases. However, they can hinder our ability to lead effectively in a complex, rapidly changing world. Garvey Berger's approach to escaping these traps is rooted in adult development theory, particularly Robert Kegan's 'orders of consciousness' theory. According to Kegan, as we grow and develop, we are able to hold increasingly complex perspectives and navigate ambiguity and uncertainty with greater ease. This 'complexity of mind' is a critical leadership skill in today's volatile, uncertain, complex, and ambiguous (VUCA) world. One of the key insights of the book is that leadership is not about having all the answers, but about asking the right questions. Leaders need to foster a culture of curiosity and continuous learning within their organizations. This involves being open to new ideas, challenging assumptions, and being willing to change course when necessary. The book also advocates for a more compassionate and empathetic leadership style. This involves moving away from ego and control and towards understanding and collaboration. Leaders need to see disagreements and conflicts not as problems to be avoided, but as opportunities for growth and learning. In addition to providing theoretical insights, the book also offers practical exercises and thought experiments to help leaders identify their own mind traps and develop strategies to escape them. These exercises are designed to promote cognitive flexibility and agility, two key attributes of effective leadership in a complex world. In conclusion, "Unlocking Leadership Mindtraps - How to Thrive in Complexity" is a must-read for any leader who wants to navigate the complexities of the modern world with grace and effectiveness. It challenges us to question our own assumptions, to embrace complexity, and to see leadership as a continual process of learning, unlearning, and relearning. It's not about eliminating complexity, but thriving within it. By reading and applying the insights from this book, leaders can develop the cognitive flexibility, complexity of mind, and compassionate leadership style that are so desperately needed in today's world.
ViewEmotional Intelligence - Why It Can Matter More Than IQ
Daniel Goleman
Key Insights from "Emotional Intelligence - Why It Can Matter More Than IQ" Emotional intelligence, referred to as EQ, is just as important if not more than IQ in determining life success. Emotional intelligence comprises five key components: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. EQ is a better predictor of success in the workplace and in relationships than IQ. Emotional intelligence can be learned and developed at any age and stage in life. Emotionally intelligent people are better at managing stress and bouncing back from adversity. A lack of emotional intelligence can lead to mental health issues such as depression and anxiety. Teaching emotional intelligence in schools can lead to better academic performance and fewer behavioral problems. Many problems in society, from violence to addiction, could be reduced if people improved their emotional intelligence. Emotional intelligence has a significant impact on leadership effectiveness. Traditional intelligence, or IQ, is a static measure that doesn't capture our ability to grow and learn. Goleman's model of emotional intelligence has been widely adopted in various fields, including business, education, and psychology. In-Depth Summary and Analysis "Emotional Intelligence - Why It Can Matter More Than IQ" by Daniel Goleman is a seminal work that has changed our understanding of human intelligence. Goleman argues that our view of intelligence is far too narrow, focusing excessively on cognitive abilities measured by IQ tests. Instead, he proposes that emotional intelligence, or EQ, is a more accurate predictor of success in life. Emotional intelligence is defined as the ability to recognize, understand, manage, and use emotions effectively. It includes five key components: self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, empathy, and social skills. Goleman asserts that these abilities are foundational for effective decision-making, relationship-building, and self-management. One of the most compelling assertions Goleman makes is that EQ is a better predictor of success than IQ. He presents numerous studies showing that people with high EQs are more likely to succeed in the workplace, have stable and satisfying relationships, and enjoy good mental health. On the other hand, a lack of emotional intelligence can lead to a variety of problems, including mental health issues, poor job performance, and difficulties in relationships. Goleman's book is not just diagnostic but also prescriptive. He argues that emotional intelligence can be learned and developed at any age. This is a significant departure from the traditional view of intelligence as static and unchangeable. It offers hope for individuals who may not have fared well in traditional academic settings but who possess the potential to develop these crucial emotional skills. The author advocates for the inclusion of emotional intelligence education in schools, citing evidence that such programs lead to better academic performance, fewer behavioral problems, and improved social skills. He suggests that many societal problems, from violence to addiction, could be reduced if people improved their emotional intelligence. Goleman's work has had a significant impact on various fields. In business, his model of emotional intelligence is now widely recognized as a key factor in leadership effectiveness. Companies are increasingly investing in training and development programs designed to enhance the emotional intelligence of their employees. In conclusion, "Emotional Intelligence - Why It Can Matter More Than IQ" is a groundbreaking and thought-provoking work that challenges our traditional notions of intelligence. By shifting the focus from IQ to EQ, Goleman invites us to rethink our priorities in education, business, and personal development. The book's key message is that our emotional competencies are critical to our success in life and that these skills can be nurtured and developed.
ViewCrucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High, Second Edition
Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, Al Switzler
Key Facts and Insights: The ability to handle crucial conversations productively is a fundamental skill for personal and professional success. Crucial conversations are those where the stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong. The book introduces a seven-step model for effective communication during crucial conversations. The aim is not to win an argument, but to arrive at a mutually beneficial outcome. The authors emphasize the importance of creating a safe environment for dialogue. The book provides techniques to manage emotions and stay focused on the desired result. It encourages honest and respectful conversation, even when the discourse is challenging. The book teaches how to influence others without resorting to power plays or manipulation. The authors' methodology is backed up by years of social science research. The techniques can be applied across different contexts, such as work, family, or social situations. The book is filled with practical examples and exercises to help the reader practice and internalize the concepts. An In-Depth Analysis: The central premise of "Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" is that the ability to navigate crucial conversations is a key determinant of success in various realms of life. The authors, Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and Al Switzler, define crucial conversations as those where the stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong. These are the conversations that often determine the course of our relationships, careers, and lives. Drawing on years of social science research, the authors present a seven-step model for effective communication during these critical interactions. This model is not about winning an argument, but about arriving at a mutually beneficial outcome. It's about fostering understanding, respect, and cooperation, even when dealing with difficult or contentious issues. Creating a safe environment for dialogue is a key principle highlighted in the book. This entails showing respect for the other person's viewpoint, even if you disagree with it. It also involves maintaining an open mind and being willing to modify your perspective based on new information. A safe environment encourages honest exchange of ideas and minimizes defensive or aggressive behavior. The authors also provide strategies for managing our emotions during these conversations. They emphasize the importance of staying focused on the desired result, rather than getting sidetracked by personal attacks or irrelevant issues. This requires self-awareness, self-control, and mental agility. The book offers a wealth of practical techniques for influencing others without resorting to power plays or manipulation. These techniques hinge on the idea that influence is more about listening and understanding than about talking and persuading. They underscore the value of empathy and patience in building relationships and resolving conflicts. The principles and techniques presented in the book can be applied across different contexts, such as work, family, or social situations. They are universally relevant because they tap into the basic human needs for respect, understanding, and fairness. The book is filled with practical examples and exercises that help the reader practice and internalize the concepts. These hands-on elements enhance the book's value as a self-improvement tool. They allow the reader to see the concepts in action and to apply them in their own lives. In conclusion, "Crucial Conversations Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High" is a comprehensive guide to mastering the art of effective communication in high-stakes situations. It is a treasure trove of insights, strategies, and practical tools that can help anyone improve their communication skills and achieve better outcomes in their personal and professional relationships. Important Concepts: Crucial Conversations: High-stakes discussions where opinions differ and emotions are strong. Safe Environment: A communication setting where individuals feel comfortable expressing their thoughts and feelings without fear of judgement or retaliation. Seven-Step Model: A structured approach to navigating crucial conversations effectively, fostering understanding, and arriving at mutually beneficial outcomes. Emotional Management: Techniques to stay focused, calm, and composed during challenging conversations. Influence without Manipulation: Ways to affect others' thoughts and behaviors through empathy, understanding, and respect, rather than through force or deceit.
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30.October 2023The session with Alessandra was super helpful and enjoyable. Alessandra is full of positive energy, with lots of experience and generosity. I felt very comfortable to to share my thoughts, deliberations and questions; Alessandra was a great listener and provided guidance and information. Many thanks, Alessandra.